September 6, 2012

The Popularized War on Women is Illegitimate

      This post deals with issues like rape, sex, abortion, and the overall social constucts that are placed upon young women today. I would know, because I'm a young woman.. today :)I've thought about writing about this for a while, but I've put it off and then put it off some more. Several months ago I think I published perhaps two sentences on this issue, but today I'm annoyed, so I'm going to publish more. Quick warning- this blog post contains the word sex. It also contains my opinions about women's reproductive rights and abortion. If you can't deal with that, I suggest you check out one of my other happier blog posts where I don't discuss things I firmly believe in. Word to the wise again, just to reiterate.  Read the first sentence again for me.
      I will be replying, in part, to an article that I will link in the bottom. It is entitled, "'Trampire:' Why the Public Slut Shaming of Kristen Stewart Matters for Young Women." Apparently KStewart got herself into a pickle with her boss, and ruined her relationship, and got herself fired. Addressing the main idea of the article, I agree. I think that this type of mass media attention on a young woman's mistakes is ridiculous. That in no way paints being a woman in a positive light.
      Now, on to my main point. This article discusses the "War on Women." So Republicans are usually pro-life. I am 100% pro-life, no death penalty, God makes it the way it's supposed to happen pro-life. But then these politicians make absolutely preposterous claims about me and my reproductive health and it makes me mad.
      Todd Akin. A man who said "legitimate" rape hardly results in pregnancy... you know what causes pregnancy? Google it! Pregnancy does not depend on the enjoyment of sex. Come on now, we don't live in the seventeenth century anymore! I liked the sarcasm in a The Onion article about how a woman was thankful because her rapist was no longer "legitimate" because she got pregnant. I think we can all agree that he made a very stupid remark and probably just threw his whole political career in the meat grinder. I mean, even Paul Ryan thinks he should resign! (I like Paul Ryan, for the record.)
      So then I get to reading articles about how he refuses to resign, and then this Gawker article pops up on my facebook feed about Trampire shirts and how Kristen Stewart is being shamed just like young women everywhere are being shamed by ill-worded (or twisted around) phrases that came from popular Republican politicians. And at first.. I agreed, because of the illegitimate rape comment. That's preposterous.
      But then I started to click on the other links in the article, which include a Paul Ryan misquote or misinterpretation saying that "rape is just another form of conception," and what they call a misguided quote from Mike Huckabee saying that "wonderful people come from rape."
      What makes me so mad is the fact that both of these statements were taken out of context. It's ridiculous to even guess that Paul Ryan thinks that rape is an acceptable form of family planning. It's stupid! He doesn't think that! But his point was that no matter how the sex happens, sometimes the sex makes a baby. And you know what? I agree. No matter how the sex happens, conception can occur. Paul Ryan just smashed Akin's backwards backwoods sex philosophy in the ground. (Burn.)
      Then on to what I truly feel passionate about... Wonderful people can come from rape. Wonderful people can come from premarital sex. Wonderful people can come from extramarital sex, and wonderful people can come from marital sex! Wonderful people come from IVF and single parent families and sperm banks. That's just how it works. And I'm sure that to the newly pregnant teenager, Huckabee's words don't seem too encouraging. But to me they are! It means that your baby does not have to grow up as an accident. It means that your child does not have to grow up as a mistake. You are your child's only hope, and by aborting you shatter that hope. You shatter the future of that baby you carry! And if you were raped and are now pregnant, yes, you have suffered a horrible thing, but that doesn't give you an excuse to ruin someone else's life to make yours easier! It doesn't justify you ending someone else's life to make yours easier.
      Children produced by rape are not in any way "fair" to the victim. Children produced by rape weren't meant to be there in the first place. Certainly rape is a terrible thing. But you know what else is terrible? The fact that when a teenager is scared to tell her parents that she's pregnant the first option that's shoved in her face is usually abortion! That's terrible. It's horrifying. Giving an emotional teenager control over a complete innocent's life is horrifying. When a boyfriend's first reaction to his college student girlfriend's pregnancy is, "Well, go take care of it," there is a problem.
      We cannot continue to penalize young women for the mistakes that they have made.  Whether that mistake is as life-changing as cheating with a man and conceiving his baby, or as innocent as walking down a street alone at night and having a life changed forever, we cannot continue to hold blame over our young ladies' heads as they grow into better people. It is not fair to society to continue this way. The war on women has never been straight from the politician's mouth. It's straight from the mouth of society! And as long as we continue to hold titles like whore and slut over the heads of our reformed young women, they will never be able to move out from under it. So do me a favor, and think very carefully before you speak. Think very carefully before you act. Think especially carefully before you end a life that will not remind you of your past experiences. Just think, and the world might end up being better.

The article to which I respond-

September 3, 2012

Is Forever Impossible?

      Marriage. Such a fantastic idea. Each girl dreams about her wedding day and what a pretty dress she'll wear and all that crap. Yeah. But where do marriages usually end up these days? In the toilet! Currently, I am losing faith in the institution of marriage. And that's a big deal coming from me.
      I had a just-fine day crammed with homework, essays, and other crap I didn't want to do but I did it anyway. Then five o'clock comes around. My mother is supposed to be home. After a fifteen-minute held over staff meeting at her daycare job, she gets home and my father starts yelling at her about how she's been with other people and not at work. My mom is fifty six. Not saying that fifty six year olds can't be promiscuous.. but really? It's ridiculous.
      This wasn't the first time this has happened, of course. Whenever she gets caught in traffic or gets held over at work or even goes shopping without me, my father is kind enough to accuse her of cheating on him.
      But finally! Something unique about this situation! My darling mother then thinks it's kind to warn me that I shouldn't bother with men because "they're all the same."

      Yeah, I'm having a great day. Right when I first start to relax and enjoy my day off of no school, I get told by my mom who is always so patient and understanding that marriage is basically pointless.
      I have a feeling that when I actually fall in love this is going to cause me a crapload of emotional issues because I can't trust anybody. Or that I'll always be scared that our marriage will fail. Or that he'll run off and leave me because I'm not good enough. God knows I've heard that enough, I mean, really.
      I am supposed to be a strong, organized, independent daughter but sometimes I feel like I want to be none of those things. Right now I feel like I want to be none of those things. I mean really, how horrifying would it be to fall in love with the person who is right for you then to run them off because you want to control the situation? Or get scared and pull back from them because you're just not sure that it'll work?
      So right now, in the middle of this long rant at sixteen years of age, I take a step back from my parents' failed marriage even though they still tolerate each other and look at my second set of parents. They have always been there for me. I know they disagree, but I have never ever heard them yell at one another. They are centered in God and are now blessed with a child of their own. And I pray with every fiber of my being that someday God will send somebody who will stick around no matter what and will make me a better person.. not a worse person. Because right now I am horrified that I will keep myself from ever making it down the aisle. I'm scared that I will be alone.
     I know God has somebody for me. It just seems very hopeless right now, with all that is going on. I don't want to be an English teacher who goes home to her eight dogs and waits for years and years to be forgiven because she screwed it up with someone special. I don't want to be that person.
     Right now forever seems impossible.